Thursday, January 2, 2014

"Why are we doing this?"

Today was a special day for our family and especially for Harmony.  For the past 18 months we have been trying to get together with her birth father, Tyler.  After a couple meetings falling through we began to wonder if it would ever actually happen.  Recently Tyler has made many positive changes in his life and has started reaching out to our family more.   Today that meeting with him finally happened!

We started convincing ourselves that maybe it didn't really matter if we/she ever had a relationship with him. But after meeting with him today we felt that God was renewing our original conviction of needing to be His light to Tyler.  God brought us an amazing gift in Harmony but we believe it is not only for our sake and hers that we are together, but also for the rest of the family involved.  Going into our meeting today, we were worried about it feeling awkward, intimidating and uncomfortable.  But it was incredibly special to see how much Tyler loves this little girl.  He held her, chased her, went down the slide and followed her everywhere with a grin from ear to ear.  Watching the tears roll down his face as he wept saying goodbye to her reminded us of not only how special this gift is but also how important an open adoption can be.  Not only for Harmony to know her birth father but for Tyler to be able to heal through seeing her and knowing she is loved.

Frequently we forget that Harmony is even adopted. She is an Anderson and part of us.  But that's not the whole story. She has other people in her life that care deeply for her and she should know that.  We had to ask ourselves today, "Why are we doing this?"  It's so Harmony can see the love her birth father has for her.  She was never abandoned or unwanted.  She was cherished and still is.  Even if today is the only time she has with him, we will be able to tell her about the new things we learned about her biological family and it will be very obvious through the photos taken, how much he loves her.

Little sis had fun too. :)